Good Enough Parenting

When My Kids Ask Why Their Parents Are Not Together, This Is What I'll Tell Them

Admin

2017-02-05

From http://www.puckermom.com/

Your dad is getting married. It’s not very surprising news considering she'a acted like a step-mother for a while. 

As this new chapter in your lives begins, I wanted to give you some perspective on the relationship I had with your dad.

We were young and made mistakes.  You were born into a family that loved each other and loved you fiercely. 

You had two parents that wanted to be a family. We were just so young and didn’t know what love really was.

We probably made every relationship mistake that could possibly be made. But you are the greatest thing to ever happen to me and your dad. 

Staying together would have been toxic, so we decided to do what was best for you. 

I know sometimes you get mad at me when you miss your dad. But trust me, two happy homes are better than one unhappy home.

We both needed to grow up and that meant growing apart. Your dad and I could not have become successful human beings or successful parents if we stayed together. 

We were too dependent on each other. We grew up to have completely different lives. One is not better than the other. Just different, and we are both happy. 

That wouldn’t have happened if we stayed together.

Even though we don’t always get along, I’m still cheering your dad on.  I might not be in the game anymore, but I’m still cheering him on from the sidelines. I never wanted to see your dad fail. 

I’m so proud of how much he has grown as a man and as a father. I love hearing you tell me how well he is doing. I want him to succeed.

I love your baby brother. I will never be a part of his life. But when I see him, my heart fills. The first time I heard him say your names, I wanted to cry. I love it when you show me pictures of him. 

He is a part of you. I see your faces when I look at him and it fills me with a love I never thought would be possible. And although it is very doubtful that he would ever need anything from me, I would do anything for him.

You are part of me, and part of your dad, and I love every piece of you.  You have so many mannerisms that make me think of your dad. It doesn’t annoy me, it doesn’t upset me. I would never ask you to change who you are because it reminds me of him. My personal feelings toward your dad will never affect how I feel about you.

I never want you to censor yourself.  You don’t have to worry about my feelings. You enjoying your family time with your dad is awesome. I want to hear all about it. 

It doesn’t make me insecure or jealous. He is just as much your parent as I am, and I want you to love him as fiercely as you love me. And I never want you to feel like you have to hide that love from me.

Even though you come from a broken family, it doesn’t mean you are broken.  You are two amazing children. You are my whole world. 

Just because our family looks different, it doesn’t make it wrong. You have three parents who love you unconditionally, and there is nothing wrong with having more people loving you and taking care of you.


Posted by CoParenting

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Divorce Quotes

Admin

2012-05-17

If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate.